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Tuesday 4 July 2017

100 Word Challenge Week 10


This weeks 100 Word Challenge prompt was ...Now what do I need?... I was focusing on changing the openings of my sentences and using level 4 punctuation. Here is a link to our class blog for awesome ideas for sentence starters.

“Don’t be late going to bed honey!”Julie and Trevor closed the door and trudged down the driveway.Timmy was a greedy kid who always has to get what he wants, he never took ‘NO’ for an answer.He was a spoilt kid who knew how to get money. But there in the corner of his greedy little eyes was Julie’s credit card. The twinkle in his eyes grew as There in his grimy little hands was the doorway to all the treats in the world!Imaginatively Timmy thought to himself, now what do I need?What should I buy...

6 comments:

  1. Ooo, what deliciously intriguing set up Emma; what a wealth of opportunities you opened up for developing your story further. As a reader this really gets my imagination fired up. Your introduction really appeals to me too, with the snippet of dialogue, naming your characters (that's really important for me!) and setting the scene.
    You've certainly achieved your aim of using a variety of sentence openings, but I have to confess I'm not sure what 'level 4 punctuation is. Sorry!
    One thing you might want to watch for is avoiding repeating similar phrases - 'there in the' and 'there in his.' Can you think how you might amend one of them?
    Well done and keep rising to the Challenge.

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  2. Hi Mr G. Sheffield,
    Thank-you for giving me some feedback on my 100 WC. I will make sure I think about this next time I write. Thank-you for putting my 100 WC in the showcase as well.

    Emma
    RM4
    Drummond

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  3. Hi Emma

    Awesome post on your 100wc. It is A really cool story and I love the descriptive words you've used to describe you character. This reminds me of when I did the 100wc at school last year. I thought they were really cool and I fun writing them. What is your favorite part about 100wc and why ?

    Zach
    Yaldhurst Model School

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    Replies
    1. Hi Zach,
      Thanks for your comment on my 100 WC. My favorite part about the 100 WC would have to be getting a new prompt because it could be anything.

      Emma
      Drummond

      Delete
  4. Hi Emma I've improved my comment here it is.

    Hi Emma
    Awesome post on your 100wc. It is A really cool story and I love the descriptive words you've used to describe your character. This reminds me of when I did the 100wc at school last year. I thought they were really cool and I fun writing them because there was a different prompt each week . What is your favorite part about 100wc and why ?

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hi Emma
    I really like how you hooked me in,as soon as i started to read it, it hooked me in like no other story has, if you could check out my 100 WC that would be great.

    Yours sincerely Jakob Room 6 OIS

    ReplyDelete

To support my learning I ask you to comment as follows:
1. Something positive - something you like about what I have shared.
2. Thoughtful - A sentence to let us know you actually read/watched or listened to what I had to say
3. Something thoughtful - how have you connected with my learning? Give me some ideas for next time or ask me a question.